Fake It
by MrRachie
Summary: When you're life isn't worth living any more the only thing left to do is FAKE IT!
1. Fake It

I do not own any of the South of Nowhere characters nor do I own the lyrics to the song **Fake It** by **Seether**

"_When someone stabs you it's not your fault that you feel pain"_

**Spencer's POV**

Why is it that when you think things can't get any worse they most certainly do. For three years now I've been the main target of Madison and her group of bitches she calls her posse. You name it they've done it flushed my head down the toilet, put pain bombs in my locker, sprayed aerosol in my eyes, pushed me, kicked me, punched me, slapped me and all sorts of weird and awful tricks. All this only started because the leader Madison (skank) decided that she would come on to me, shit hit the fan when I knocked her back and now she has had it in for me since. Don't get me wrong I never go for the anatomy when I look for someone to be with, in my opinion it's not the action that counts it's who you're with and how they make you feel; yeah Madison is slim, curvy has a nice ass and big tits however I just didn't know her so why would I ever give her my virginity? I may seem picky but sex in my opinion is pointless if the person entering you is a complete stranger because it'd just be plain sex and not an action that makes the bond between two people stronger. I've been brought up a Catholic so my sexual orientation isn't known to anyone as it'd cause too many problems and my mother Paula, she'd kick my ass to Jesus camp to prey away the gay so to speak.

Since that night Madison has made it her mission to seek her revenge on me, it started off with name calling but then when I was cast a bigger part in our theatre group she became more violent, I was so proud to be the lead role till it was taken off me and given to Madison and rumor has it she only got my part because she slept with the director! So now I take beating after beating and am left with scars both mental and physical which has left me a loner. I used to have many friends but since the bullying they're too scared to even come near me just in case they get beaten too. My parents are so worried about me since I can't bring myself to tell them what's happened and why it has happened, every time I come home beaten my mum (being a nurse) observes my injuries and if it's really bad takes me to the hospital, the school have promised to keep me under constant surveillance to ensure I don't get beaten at school so break and lunch I spend in the staff room which is just humiliating but even then as soon as I walk out of the gates I'm preyed upon like a tiger preys upon its prey and there's nothing anyone can do about it. Life to me right now just isn't worth living why should I live in a world where I feel so alone and live in fear?

It was snowing and as per usual Madison got her hands on me after the bell and I took my usual beating but this time, this time got even worse she'd sunk to an even lower level by getting 4 of her posse to hold me down so she can rip my t-shirt and bra off me exposing my breasts I fought, I really did but was just not strong enough, I was so cold right now but I just kept kicking and screaming for them all to leave me the fuck alone, she just laughed and started to pour something what smelt like urine all over me spitting in my face while my body lay limp from the soccer boys kicking me like a football after Madison told them I was the one that got them disqualified from the semis.

I managed to crawl into the drama studio where we hold some of our school shows and let it all out. I cried for the embarrassment and hurt I was feeling, I smelt was freezing and blood was trickling from my nose and mouth. Suddenly a dark figure appeared on stage, I knew I was in for another beating; I couldn't do anything but wait for it to happen as I had no more fight left in me. The lights came up and I could see a dark haired girl standing in the middle, I'd never seen her before in my whole life, she just stared at me and then believe it or not music started and I felt compelled to listen.

**Who's to know if your soul will fade at all**

**The one you sold to fool the world  
>You lost your self-esteem along the way<br>Yeah**

She now comes down to me singing:

**Good god you're coming up with reasons  
>Good god you're dragging it out<br>Good god it's the changing of the seasons  
>I feel so raped<br>So follow me down  
>And just fake it if you're out of direction<br>Fake it if you don't belong here  
>Fake it if you feel like affection<br>Woah you're such a fucking hypocrite**

**And you should know that the lies won't hide your flaws**  
><strong>No sense in hiding all of yours<strong>  
><strong>You gave up on your dreams along the way<strong>  
><strong>Yeah<strong>

She pulls me up by the hands smiles and sings:

**Good god you're coming up with reasons  
>Good god you're dragging it out<br>Good god it's the changing of the seasons  
>I feel so raped<br>So follow me down  
>And just fake it if you're out of direction<br>Fake it if you don't belong here  
>Fake it if you feel like affection<br>Woah you're such a fucking hypocrite**

Just as she got to the end of that verse she pointed to me and told me to sing the next verse, I loved this song and knew all the lyrics so I found myself singing:

**I can fake with the best of anyone**  
><strong>I can fake with the best of em all<strong>  
><strong>I can fake with the best of anyone<strong>  
><strong>I can fake it all<strong>

**Who's to know if your soul will fade at all**  
><strong>The one you sold to fool the world<strong>  
><strong>You lost your self-esteem along the way<strong>  
><strong>Yeah<strong>

**Good god you're coming up with reasons  
>Good god you're dragging it out<br>Good god it's the changing of the seasons  
>I feel so raped<strong>

**So follow me down  
>And just fake it if you're out of direction<br>Fake it if you don't belong here  
>Fake it if you feel like affection<br>Woah you're such a fucking hypocrite**

**Fake it if you're out of direction**  
><strong>Fake it if you don't belong here<strong>  
><strong>Fake it if you feel like infection<strong>  
><strong>Woah you're such a fucking hypocrite<strong>

After the song finished I couldn't help but smile she simply just looks at me and tells me her name is Ashley, she's seen the way I've been getting treated and that I shouldn't stand up for it any longer so like the song says I should fake my way to get the justice I've been hoping for and that she was willing to guide me. I didn't know what to say so she put it plainly "you can either get beaten to death or say goodbye to the old Spencer Carlin and fake it with me". What other option did I have other than to take her up on her offer, she then simply just said she'd meet me here at 4pm for the teaching to begin and walked out with a broad smile on her face.

_A.N I'd really appreciate any reviews as I'm in two minds on whether to carry on but if I do carry on a lot of mature content is to be expected _


	2. Lessons Begin

I do not own any of the South of Nowhere characters

**Lessons Begin**

_Dare to reach out your hand into the darkness, to pull another hand into the light _

**Spencer's POV**

I'm not used to anyone wanting to help me unless it's someone like twice my age or someone in my family. This girl Ashley actually wanted to help me and I was glad, I really was, however I didn't get what she meant by "say goodbye to the old Spencer Carlin and fake it with me". I mean I know that obviously it sucks to be me right now but how can faking things get you anywhere in life. My Mom always taught me to be true to yourself and that no matter what, if you desire anything in life you work for it and through this work you'll succeed.

4pm came and I was waiting in the same place I stood in yesterday waiting for her to come in. It came to quarter past and I knew she wasn't coming. Why was I so stupid to think that anyone would want to help me? What is it about me that makes people stay away? I was just about to leave the door for someone to come beat me when she ran in telling me that a teacher had kept their class late and she was so sorry. Well at that moment I was just full of awe, she turned up, I mean she's actually standing in front of me! I just felt like part of the imaginary hole I had in my chest due to all the hurt I was exposed to was shrinking. It was my turn to speak and I got straight to the point and asked what exactly she meant about "faking it". She simply just looked at me with big eyes and simply said that this Spencer Carlin was getting nowhere so by re-inventing yourself (so to speak) and tearing down the main people that either had it in for me or favored other people for their own pleasure would make my life worth living again. This made sense but one thing that I still didn't get was how the hell we were supposed to accomplish this "mission" if you like? She grabbed my hand and led me to a classroom and told me sit for the lesson to begin.

I sat and was eager to know on what was going to be in store for me. She began by writing on the board a number one. Whilst this was happening I couldn't help but stare at her ass, I know it's a bad idea to zone out whilst she was beginning her "lesson" but it was just too good not to, I mean the shape, the firmness, you could see through the leggings she was wearing which revealed a sexy lace thong, just looking was making me wet never mind if I got to touch... I snapped out of it and saw her staring at me as if I were supposed to give a response. I swallowed and she sighed and began saying what she'd said again. She began by saying that firstly my attitude to life had to change apparently I'm too innocent for my own good, so she was going to teach me how to look, act and talk. I was reluctant to change my whole personality but she assured me that it was more of a front than a change of my whole personality, I really couldn't argue about that and so before I had a chance to change my mind she moved swiftly on to the next point of Madison.

She had to think about this one but then something in her big brown eyes that told me that she had a plan. She began by asking me why Madison had it in for me and so I told her everything. She listened carefully, all she could say was "genius". She stood there and grinned to herself for a while whilst playing with her hair and then said that after the makeover one of the payback missions would be to give out signals to Madison almost teasing her to a point where she'd have to give in to temptation. Then from there tear her piece by piece till she could never be a problem.

She carried on by saying the first way in which we could hurt her rep within the school was for me to play Mr Cooper a visit for another audition that would certainly give the part that I rightfully had and deserved till Madison went and ruined it all by sleeping with him. The only rule she had was that my parents could know nothing about her apart from the fact that she was a friend, of which was a pretty easy rule to comply with. The lesson carried on till like 8pm and the more involved with Ashley I was the more confident I felt in taking Madison down giving her a little taste of her own medicine on the way. I gave Ashley my phone number and address so that this weekend we could work on my image and to plan escape routes so that I didn't have to come home each day with more and more bruises.

When I got home I actually had a smile on my face, I walked in to see my Mom's medical kit out and a shocked face to see my smile. My Mom was the first to ask what got me in such a good mood. All I could say was that I just never got beaten up. Both my parents just looked at me in complete and utter shock but then smiled. I sat down on the sofa and they both stared at me so I knew something was wrong and asked what. They didn't know where to start. They started by asking me how a trip to Philadelphia this weekend sounded because they were both at a medical conference, I began by trying to be thankful for the offer but told them I had a few assignments to be getting on with, I told them they can make it up to me when they got back and we'd go out for a meal or something.

My parents finally left for their conference and I rang Ashley to tell her it would be okay now for her to come over. Ten minutes later the bell went and I opened the door to Ashley, I looked her up and down because everything about her caught my eye she was wearing a lacy black top with writing which said 'Heavy Metal Chick' which showed a lot of cleavage and as you looked further down she was only wearing a pair of skimpy short shorts which just looked mouth watering on her. She smiled at me and simply instructed me to lock up and that she was taking me shopping for my new look.

Shopping was just one of those jobs I certainly didn't like to do, I know most girls would love a good shopping spree but it's just not for me. We went into a few stores and finally Ashley had seen what she had been looking for. She picked it up I couldn't help but gasp; she gave me the eye and sent me into the changing room to try out an outfit. I came out to show her wearing a short skirt which nearly showed my pants and a vest top that showed a lot of cleavage. I kind of have to admit I looked great in the mirror but I really didn't feel comfortable wearing this sort of stuff. After a few hours shopping Ashley had picked out a whole wardrobe of clothes and as the day went along I actually liked the fact that I wasn't the insecure me and that I could walk down the street with a smile on my face. We got back into my car and I was about to take us back to my place when she asked whether it's a good idea to go to the beach and have a picnic since it was sunny. I agreed and after picking up some supplies we were off.

As we got to the beach it was like a dream. The sea was a clear blue which matched the sky and the sun was blazing down on us. We sat down with our picnic and began talking about life. I know that life maybe a wide subject but life was where it had to begin for us both to really be able to understand each other. At the end of our picnic I'd found out so much about Ashley and to my surprise we had so much in common even our guilty pleasures such as dancing and our taste for classical music. Ashley seemed to be all I was missing in life; she just slotted in and I really enjoyed it.

The next subject came up and it was sex. She asked me if there were any men in my life and all I could say to her was the most simplistic answer no. I absentmindedly got up and started walking, I could feel her by my side and she asked why. I turned to her with tears starting to fill in my eyes and let everything out. I began by telling her how it was difficult to have a boyfriend especially when most guys at school wanted the one thing I was reluctant to give them, plus who would want to go out with someone whose head was flushed down the toilet, thrown in garbage cans and got beaten black and blue every day. I then carried on by saying that I can barely keep hold of a friend never mind someone who I can be close to and be able to trust to protect me and to not desert me when I need them most. She just looked at me with saddened eyes and held my hand. I can't tell you how much I needed that right now, I was in two minds I'd just spilt some of my deepest feelings out to someone I'd barely known a week but I felt like I could trust her to keep all that I said a secret.

We sat down after walking on the beach for an hour telling each other favourite films, favourite foods etc, we were now overlooking the setting sun and she seemed held back like she wanted to ask me something, I positioned myself so I could see her face and asked her what was wrong. She came closer as if to whisper what she was holding back and instead of a whisper her lips touched mine. Her lips were soft, her breath intoxicating and she pulled away. I was just astonished; I really wasn't expecting anything like that. She quickly stood up and said she was so very sorry and started walking away from me. I have no idea why but my heart started beating ten to the dozen, I had the sudden urge to taste her, I just got up ran after her. As I got to her she looked so sad, I just took the hold of her arm so she had to stop walking and forcefully pressed my lips onto hers. It was all new but I loved every second of it, her tongue wrapped around mine, one hand in my hair and the other holding me close was slipping me into pure ecstasy...


End file.
